Aggie's Letter

My first day working at KCDC was on October 14th, 2022. Right around this time, I had just come out of a particularly gnarly depressive episode and was just starting to get comfortable in my normal everyday life. It was an adjustment for sure; after months of feeling down, I was thrown into a work environment in which everyone had to be face-to-face with strangers on a daily basis. 

There are times in a person's life when they need people, they need a community, they need a family. For some, this can mean a chosen family, and for others, this can mean by blood. For me personally, the lines between family by blood and chosen family are blurred. Most people don’t grow up with an idea as to what a healthy, positive family can look like. Although I was fortunate enough to grow up in a loving home, there were times when I felt alone and isolated from those who shared the same DNA as me, like they didn’t understand me. In times like these, I had to find solace in my chosen family. After two weeks of working at KCDC, I quickly realized the people surrounding me, including Amy, were my family. They were there for me in ways no one had ever been there for me before. I felt safe in this work environment and was thankful for them throughout one of the hardest times in my life. 

KCDC is a chosen family for a lot of people, not only employees but also folks who feel distant from others within the skateboarding community. My fondest memories of 80 N 3rd are days when folks would pull up just to hang out, letting us employees know they felt safe in our presence and safe within our shop. Yes, this is partially due to us, the employees, trying to make it known that everyone is safe at KCDC, but also due to Amy’s influence over the past 20-something years. 

I first met Amy about three weeks into my first month at KCDC. We didn’t know one another at all, and I was extremely nervous to meet her. The day we met was a particularly bad day for me; I was really struggling. I remember sitting on the stairs, trying to calm myself down. To my surprise, Amy sat down next to me, asking what was going on, wanting to hear about what I was going through, and offering advice as best as she could. With her palm on the center of my back, she listened. She didn’t know me at all, but she listened. After ten minutes of talking to her, I felt better and continued the rest of my shift. She made it known from that day forward that she was always there for me and any of us working there, no matter what.  

Amy has created a pillar of NYC skateboarding through KCDC. She’s made a safe space for queer and BIPOC folks, as well as a community gathering space for people to connect with one another. On my days off, I would find myself meeting friends at KCDC to go and skate or just to spend the day loitering at the shop, eventually realizing we didn’t want to go anywhere else and staying until the shop closed. 

I learned a lot about what it means to be a human being at KCDC. Early on in my job, Amy taught me to treat everyone with kindness. She taught me to meet people where they are because, at the end of the day, you never really know where that person is coming from or where they’re going. There are days when it’s really hard to give someone grace. Amy taught me to push through that feeling and allow yourself to give grace anyway, even if they don’t deserve it in the moment. Amy is not only an incredible boss but an incredible person. I feel very fortunate to have had her as my boss and to have her as my friend. 

Last week, I was with Abi in her car on North 3rd Street. I can’t remember if we were just sitting there trolling on our phones or talking about some bullshit, but one of us turned to the other and said, 

“Where are we gonna go now?” 

“Huh?” 

“Like when the shop closes? Where are we gonna go?” 

The truth is, I don’t know. I don’t know where we’ll go. I don’t know where we’ll all gather to begin or end our days. I don’t know how our community will be affected by the monumental loss of a safe gathering space. All I know is that this is not the end of KCDC. Yes, we have lost this physical being, the physical gathering space, but Amy had lost the physical storefront before and prevailed through. 

The physical being of KCDC may seem like the most community-based element, but to me, what is the most influential is the multiple messages Amy and other employees push forward through the KCDC brand itself. Amy has dedicated her brand to being as inclusive as it can by highlighting queer and young upcoming artists for guest graphics or hosting events that highlight the safety of folks who may not always feel safe within the skateboarding community. This message of inclusivity will continue on without the physical space, and I’m sure Amy and other shop employees will continue to discover new ways to promote that message. 

Back to Saturday, the closing party. Although there were moments of sadness, moments where I would look around at this space and feel overwhelmed by the unknown of what was going to happen next, I felt comforted by the fact that there were tons of people in that small pink shop celebrating the life of a major cultural hub of NYC skateboarding. This gave me hope. Getting to see folks I hadn’t seen in ages and familiar faces who were just ready to have a good time, I felt that sense of chosen family all over again. 

This is not the end for KCDC, but rather a moment to gather our thoughts and think about the next move. While sitting in the unknown is uncomfortable and may seem scary, I encourage everyone to think about the impact KCDC has had on NYC skateboarding and the trials and tribulations the brand has been through in the past; if we can get through that shit, we can get through anything.

Whenever I feel sad or anxious about this place being gone, I think of the number of people there on Saturday night to show love. I think about the skate sesh’s we’d have right outside the shop, skating the rail, the bench, a cone, even a fucking tree at one point. I think about my friends talking in a circle on the floor, and me eventually telling them to move so I can mop at the end of the night. I think about that first night I did inventory with Amy, we laughed so hard we peed our pants on the sales floor (I mopped that up too don’t worry y’all.) I think about Nate and I watching Home Alone 3 on the projector on Christmas Eve (sorry Amy.) I think about Corey and Natalie and I being stressed out of our mind and then suddenly Pippa the neighborhood dog comes in and we’re healed. I think about how Shauny almost landed that fakie flip after I recorded them for thirty minutes (I got you on that anytime Shauny.) I think about how lucky I was to get to work with my best friend in the whole world, and how I miss the days where it would just be Abi and I on the sales floor. When I think about all of this, I know this is not the end of KCDC. Rather just a new beginning, a different type of beginning. 

I am blessed to be a part of the KCDC family, and feel very fortunate to have been able to write this letter.

I love you Amy.

This is only the beginning.

Some quotes from other KCDC members - 

Shauny Stamm (@8unnystuff) - KCDC, to me, is a place where I don't need to be afraid to be myself, be gay, or be upset. It's a place of community where anyone could come together. a place of safety in skateboarding. I don’t really feel like I have that anymore. 

Osk (@grrankler) - KCDC is a beautifully curated community of people who all love each other. To me, KCDC means love set in stone through all the struggle of being a human being. It means the support you can lie on when you don’t know what to do, or even when you do, that will never leave your side. KCDC showed me how peace and kindness can save us all. 

Natalie Thomas (@babynataliet) - KCDC has always meant possibility: the possibility that I too can be a part of skateboarding, the possibility of having a platform to share my personal expression of skateboarding, and the possibility to explore more than I knew about skateboarding. 

Elisa Martini (@elisamartiniofficial) -  I’ll never forget the first time I met Amy. I knew that she was going to be someone special and important in my life. Thank you Amy for giving me something so special at KCDC.

Abi Teixeira (@inmymfbag) -  It’s hard to put into words what KCDC means to me, and how much of an impact it has had on the NYC community as a whole. I’ve met some incredible people and had some amazing opportunities that I would have never had without KCDC. A million times thank you. Thank you Amy, you’re the strongest person I know and I look up to you.

Jessyka Bailey (@youhitmefirst) - Kcdc is more than just a brick and mortar or a lease written and then signed on paper. KCDC is a family, a feeling and a bond.

Moses Campos (@mistermosesguy)- I’ve never had a bad moment at the shop. I feel so welcomed and loved by all the friends I have made and KCDC was the bonding agent between us. I would have never met such beautiful people had it not been for the shop and for that I am forever grateful. KCDC is my family. KCDC is my home.

Reina Landfield (@pondluver) - Growing up around kcdc, I met such amazing people and such wavy vibes. I am so grateful I get to be a part of a beautiful community and for the opportunities they give me and others. Kcdc has helped me grow and has provided open minded kindness to everybody. Thank you kcdc!